when you love a song but you listened to it a lot during a really bad time in your life so it reminds you of bad times
the scary thing about dating is that you are either going to marry that person or break up
deep thoughts from an anus
How to spend hours on the Internet without realizing a novel by me
This one goes out to all the girls whose thighs are so thick you can’t cross your legs.
This is truth. Shoutout to the girls with thighs big enough to be used as warming pillows.
And big ups to the girls whose upper thighs still touch when their knees are apart.
literally how does anyone not believe in aliens
are u really so anthropocentric that you think there are millions and billions and trillions of light years of the ever expanding universe but we’re the only life to possibly exist smh
things I can’t imagine
- someone having a crush on me
- someone randomly seeing me and thinking ‘wow s/he’s cute’
- someone getting happy because I messaged them first
- someone thinking about me, in general
- someone wondering how I am
- someone finding me attractive
- someone doing something to try and impress me
- someone asking their friend on what to say to me
- someone wanting to get to know me
wouldnt it be fucking scary if you had a clock that counted down until the moment you die. like what if it could be altered too like one day it says 70 years left but then you do something and it says 10 minutes left and youre like what the fuck i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up
what if you got on a plane and then as soon as it took off everybodys clock changed to 20 minutes